Every parent hopes that their child will grow up and still wants a close relationship with them. But close ties do not happen accidentally – they are built by small, daily interactions that make the child feel safe, seen and valued.
As Conscious parental researcher And the coach, I studied over 200 families. I found out that the way you react to your children from the day they are born determines how strong your relationship with them is when adults are.
If you want your children to always trust, respect and want to be around you, no matter how old they are, start doing these seven things early.
1. Tell them that their feelings matter
Children must feel safe and comfortable sharing their feelings. But when they hear “everything is fine” or “This is not a big deal”, they begin to believe that their feelings are not important and ultimately stop sharing them.
Instead of rejecting emotions, confirm them. To help them feel hearing, say, “It sounds frustrating” or “I see you are nervous.” Emotional security is not about solving problems – it is about making sure that they feel understandable.
2. Choose a control call
Parenting based on fear, penalties or constant correction creates a distance. Children will learn to hide parts of themselves to avoid disappointment.
Parents who remain close to their children do not require obedience. Instead, they prioritize to build trust. Simple moments – laughing together, listening without judgment, showing empathy – help children feel safe.
When children feel safe, they still look for your support in adulthood.
3. Give them a voice in your life
When parents make all decisions, children begin to think: My actions don't matter anyway, so why have an opinion about something?
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Instead of deciding everything about them, ask “what do you think?” or “what is right for you?” Let them make small choices, such as collecting clothes, a hobby or what to eat.
4. Had your mistakes
Parents expect respect from their children, but they don't always model him.
Apraying teaches children that respect goes both ways. Saying: “I used and sorry” shows them that relationships do not apply to power, but mutual understanding.
Children raised in homes where responsibility is the norm, they are not afraid of making mistakes. Instead of hiding their struggles, they trust that they can come to you without shame.
5. Give your daily habit time together
A strong relationship is not built in one big conversation – it is created by small, consistent moments.
What shapes your bond is not only the time spent together, but how often your child feels priority. Sharing a meal, reading before bedtime or simply checking their day strengthens the bond.
Children who feel valued in small ways will naturally remain close to you in later life.
6. Let them be without judgment
If the child feels constantly compared or evaluated, he begins to shrink to match. Over time, they learn to hide their real thoughts, interests and struggles.
Helping children in accepting yourself begins with how you react to them. Instead of showing disadvantages, celebrate their uniqueness. Encouraging their interests, even if they do not adapt to your expectations, he informs them that you love them exactly as it is.
When the children grow up, they feel accepted, they will not have to choose between being themselves and staying close to you.
7. Protect the relationship against the appropriate one
There will be moments when you and your child do not see the eye. If you always press the “right” at the expense of the connection, they will learn that your approval is conditional. They can observe their childhood, but they will distance themselves in adulthood.
Instead of proveing that focus on understanding. If your child does not agree with you, lean to the will to close them. Answer with curiosity: “Tell me more about why you feel like this.”
When children know that they can express themselves and still be loved and respected, they grow up to adults who trust the relationship and are not afraid of him.
Reem Raouda He is a leading voice in conscious parenting, a certified trainer and creator OBLIGED -Parent-child-like connection magazine, designed to cultivate emotional intelligence, self-worth and trust in all life. It is widely recognized for work in the field of emotional safety of children and strengthening the parent-child ties. Follow her Instagram.
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